I don't feel right, I don't sleep tight, i don't love you like I should...

Warning: Mom, you're not allowed to ask me about this entry.

The scariest thing in the world to me is the prospect of turning into my father. He and I share several similar characteristics, and i'm not sure i'm okay with that. I look at his life. He's a relatively happy man, but he doesn't have a lot of close friends. He spends his time with casual aquaintences, but has allowed certain people he's known for years to slip away as time goes on. (There's more that I fear, but it is not applicable to the point i am making). I look back at who I am. At those I have let slip away, and notice that I am incredibly capable of closing off and losing those I care about.

I'm prickly when I work hard. Sensitive. Quick to react. Quick to anger. I hold in weeks of frustration and release it to unsuspecting people that are just trying to befriend me. I'm not an easy person to love on all levels. Yet those that are willing to care about me, I hurt.

Interesting revelations for first thing in the morning... now I must go put on a smile and teach the youth of America.